My mother-in-law divorced my father-in-law more than a decade ago but this month flew across the country to attend his mom’s funeral. She claims they kept in touch all these years and she had every right to attend. The family thinks, at best, she went to get back with her ex or, at worst, that she wants some of grandma’s possessions. I feel badly as I urged her to do what she felt was right and likely contributed to her feeling justified in attending the service. Do I own up that I encouraged her to go? — DAUGHTER-IN-LAW COULD BE OUTLAW
My Answer : Unless you’ve donned an ‘ASK ME!’ button in the meantime, why would anyone think you had anything to do with her presence at the funeral? We’re not talking Zombi Slave here, are we? That family of yours has too much time on their hands, time that could be better spent picking up litter in the neighborhood or helping the elderly across streets. Let’s focus on help for Haiti or oil spills in the gulf and leave the petty speculations to the tiny minds.
Hard to see any real question here, what with a grown woman fearing she has unduly influenced another (and older) grown woman to do something socially repugnant (or not). Sounds like speculation on a small-town porch.